Names: Lying, Crying, Trying
by nayru-kleinefee
Summary: [KakaIru] Kakashi is madly in love with Iruka but too insecure of himself to ask his favourite Chuunin out. Lucky for him, Iruka does the first step, but problems and misunderstandings don't end with that.
1. Part 1: Lying

Disclaimer: Don't own.   
Names, Part 1 - Lying 

by nayru-kleinefee

"Mission completed, mission completed, mission…"

"Naruto, could you just shut up?" Sakura sounds like she's ready to kill. I can't blame her. If Naruto wasn't my student, I'd already punched him into the nearest wall.

Twice.

At least.

"But we succeeded in completing another mission", Naruto complains. "You should be happy, too, Sakura-chan!"

"I am, but-"

"But there's no need to sing 'Mission completed' for half an hour, dope", Sasuke finishes. Wow, that was the longest sentence he's spoken the whole day. He must be really pissed, too.

"Sasuke and Sakura are right", I say before Naruto can start another never-ending rambling about Sasuke calling him names. "You all did a good job today, but now let's just hand in this report and then go home."

"Erm, Kakashi-sensei…" I see Naruto scratching his head. Damn, that boy's gonna try to be intelligent again.

"Yes?"

"Why did you insist on coming with us to hand in the report today? You normally send us alone and… I don't know, go home or something."

"I have to make sure from time to time that you do everything properly." I shrug and take out my Icha Icha Volume 7 – my favourite. Hope it will shut him up.

"But, Kakashi-sensei, we-"

"Look, we're there", I interrupt him, then enter the mission room quickly.

Now let's see… There are Genma, Raidou, several Chuunin carrying papers, some Jounin handing in reports…

But no Iruka… -sensei.

Damn.

I take a quick glance at the clock in the room – we've been fast today, so it's only 4:56 p.m. He should be here, his shift ends at 5 o'clock and he would never leave early.

So where is he?

Maybe he changed shifts with somebody?

I have to suppress a groan of frustration and disappointment. Great. The one-in-a-hundred day me and my little pains-in-the-ass make it here in time and Iruka changes shifts.

Lucky me.

And it's 'Iruka-sensei', Hatake. Don't try to fool yourself. It is and will always be 'Iruka-sensei' for you.

My days aren't anywhere near good if I don't see my favourite Chuunin at least once every twenty-four hours. (Speaking to him would make my entire week.) And because I know that he would never of his own free will spend time with someone like me, I have to steal his time somehow…

Maybe I can sneak into the Academy after handing in the report and see if he's there grading tests. Or maybe have a short look at him through the window of his apartment. Or-

"Kakashi-sensei, what are you waiting for?", Naruto asks curiously. "Didn't you want to hand in our report?"

"You do it", I answer, giving him the paper and burying my nose in the story where a handsome brunet schoolteacher and the school's security guard are locked up inside the school building for the night. And the schoolteacher has a pony-tail. Nice.

But it doesn't help. So where could Iruka be at this time of the day?

-sensei.

"What! You come here with us only to let us do it?", Naruto yells. What is he referring to? Oh, yes…

"Obviously", I snarl. Just do it and let me go search for my Iruka, you noisy little-

Not that he'll ever be _my_ Iruka.

-sensei.

I sigh.

"Is everything alright, Kakashi-sensei?", Sakura questions.

"Yes." Even better. Not only is Naruto confused now, also is Sakura worried. And even Sasuke looks like he would pay attention to my behaviour. Great day, Hatake. I groan inwardly, shut my book and put it back in my pocket.

"Are you sure, sensei?"

"Yes, I am", I say as calmly as possible. "Everything is perfectly fine. I just remembered that I have to be somewhere." Academy first, then outside the window of Iruka's apart- Iruka_-sensei's_ apartment. "I'm sorry, but it's really urgent that I leave now, so-"

"Don't believe him. He's lying", someone laughs suddenly from behind me.

I turn around to see who dares to-

"Iruka-sensei!" Did I just chirp his name? I sure hope not…

"Hello, Kakashi-sensei." That adorable Chuunin gives me a stunning smile and walks closer to me (and the others).

"Iruka-sensei!" Naruto runs a few steps and tackles his former sensei. He'll better not hurt my Iruka.

-sensei. And it's not 'my'. Never will be. Remember, Hatake?

"Hey, be careful", Iruka_-sensei_ laughs as he swings the blond brat around and then ruffles his hair. I suddenly wish I was twelve again.

"What do you mean, Kakashi-sensei is lying?", Sakura asks after Iruka_-sensei_ has freed himself from Naruto's embrace. "How do you know?"

"I can tell." Iruka-sensei grins and winks at me.

He winks.

At me.

"How can you tell? Tell me? Please? Pleeeease?", Naruto pleads.

I know I should interrupt them now – I don't know how Iruka figured it out, but Naruto and the others knowing whenever I lie to them would be disastrous.

-sensei.

But…

He winked at me.

"No telling, Naruto." Iruka-sensei smiles again. "Can't let you read your teacher, can I?"

"But-"

"No telling. But I'm sure Kakashi-sensei always has a good reason for lying to you."

"Do you, Kakashi-sensei?", Sakura questions, sounding highly suspicious.

"I do." Do I? I really do, don't I? Hard to tell with Iruka smiling at me like that and that scar on his nose crinkling so adorably…

Oh, yes, I remember. That was my reason…

And it's '-sensei'.

"I bet he wants you all to learn how to detect lies so you will be prepared if you have to deal with enemy nins", Iruka-sensei states, now grinning. He doesn't look like a sensei now.

"…Yes." I nod. "To make you learn how to detect lies." That's a really good reason, now that I think about it.

"Oh, then it's okay", Sakura agrees hesitantly.

"Enemy nins?" Naruto's eyes widen visibly. "When will we have to deal with enemy nins? Tomorrow? Kakashi-sensei? Tomorrow?"

"Never if you don't hand in that mission report soon", Iruka laughs then glances at the clock. "I can't take it from you anymore, my shift ended two minutes ago." I can almost see him making plans for his free time.

Without me, of course.

"I will!" Naruto nods eagerly then storms away to queue up after three other ninja in the line, Sakura and Sasuke on his heels.

"Where have you been up till now?", I ask Iruka-sensei after the little… ones are out of earshot. Not that I just HAVE to know. I'm not jealous. Not the tiniest bit.

At least I don't have a right to be. He's not mine and never will be.

"Taking some reports to the Hokage to sign", he answers, shrugging.

"Oh." Good. Just the Hokage.

We stand near the door for a while, watching the first kunoichi in the row hand in her report and leave. It's nice just to stand next to him like that, pretending to wait for my students although they could now vanish any time and I wouldn't care…

Well, I guess I would, but they won't, so I don't have to-

"Don't you want to know how I could tell you were lying?", Iruka suddenly whispers into my ear and I jump a little. When did he come this close? Not that I mind…

"M-hm." I nod. This close I can smell him – a little ink and chalk and… mmmmh, is that his shampoo? No, I bet it's his conditioner. He has to use one, for his hair is so shiny and smooth (I bet) and perfect and- I suppress a sigh. He smells soooo good.

"I could tell you…"

"Please." Tell me everything you want. I could listen to you all day.

"But better not here, don't you think? Too many people. You sure don't want anybody to eavesdrop?"

"No, certainly not!" Going someplace else. With Iruka. Alone. YAY!

-sensei.

"So… What do you think about dinner tonight? We could go to that little restaurant near the Hokage Tower if you'd like…"

"Sounds go-" Wait… Did he just- "Did you just-"

"Ask you out?" Iruka grins a little, scratches his nose a little, blushes a little. "I did."

"Oh." I feel myself blush a lot under my mask. I have to be dreaming.

"So, would you like to go?"

"I- Yes… Yes, I really would like to go." I can't stop myself. I grin like mad and it's a luck for me he can't see it under the mask – he'd probably run away scared like hell.

"It's a date then." Iruka smiles.

"Yes, a date."

A date.

A Date.

A DATE.

With Iruka.

With IRUKA.

A DATE with IRUKA.

'IRUKA' without '-sensei'.

"You scratch the side of your right upper thigh", he whispers suddenly.

"What?" I look down but my hands have twisted themselves in my vest at some part of the conversation.

"Not now." Iruka laughs quietly, his breath tickling my ear. "You do it when you lie. That's why I can tell."

"…Oh."

"M-hm." He grins and winks again.

"But- but why are you telling me now? I thought you would tell me tonight?" Doesn't he want to go out anymore? He must have seen me grinning and that must have scared him. Stupid Hatake!

But I can't blame him. I wouldn't want to date someone like me, and after the dinner (at the latest) he won't want it anymore either, so-

"Well, I'd like us to meet tonight because we want to be with each other, not because I need to tell you."

Oh. "I- I would have come because I wanted to… be with you." I always want to be with you.

"I know that, Kakashi." Iruka laughs again. "I only wanted to make sure that you know I will do so, too."

I feel myself blush again.

Maybe he can be _my_ Iruka some day. Maybe if I try really hard.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Iruka-sensei?"

I force my eyes away from the four little figures approaching the Hokage-Tower and turn around to look at Kotetsu and Izumo. "Yes?"

"We're sorry, Iruka-sensei, but could you do us a favour?"

Right now? Can't it wait till- "Sure. What is it?"

"Could you take these papers to the Hokage to sign? We have just been called out on a mission, otherwise we'd do it ourselves."

"Sure, no problem." I smile at Izumo while he hands me the papers. "Come back safe."

"We will. Thank you, Iruka-sensei."

I sigh and take a look at the clock. 4:48 p.m. I turn around again and watch the four figures, one tall and three smaller ones, nearing the Tower, then I take another look at the papers.

Great. The one-in-a-hundred day they're on time for my shift and I have to leave the room. But there aren't that many papers, so maybe…

I take on a measured pace to walk out the mission room. Once I've reached the floor, I take a quick look around to see if somebody's watching.

No one's there. Good.

I pick up speed and hurry down the floor towards the Hokage's office. Maybe I'm lucky and I'll be back in time to see him…

And Naruto.

A little pang of guilt twists my stomach. I really, really like the boy and it's not fair to wait for somebody else in the first place, but… I just can't help it.

I knock at the door and enter, handing the papers to the Hokage sitting on his desk.

After some time inside the Hokage's office I can't help but throw a nervous glance at the clock. 4:53 p.m. And he's still reading and signing.

"Waiting for the end of your shift, Iruka-sensei?", the Hokage asks suddenly.

I jump a little. "No, Hokage-sama." Then I decide to go for a part of the truth. "I just saw Naruto and his team approaching the Tower before I came here…" And he is with them today. Maybe today he will finally-

"Then you should really hurry back, Iruka-sensei. Don't want to miss him, do you?" The Hokage smiles at me in a way that…

Does he know?

"No, Hokage-sama", I say, still wondering.

"Go back, Iruka. I'll have someone else take these back." He gestures at the papers on his desk.

"Thank you, Hokage-sama." I bow and turn around.

Outside the door I stop and wonder. Does he know? Or did I just misinterpret that smile? Is it that obvious that everybody- I shake my head. No, it isn't. Maybe the Hokage knows, but no one else, I'm sure about that.

I walk back to the mission room. I know, I'm not a very open person, so there's no way anyone could have noticed my… Infatuation? Crush? Lo-

I guess 'crush' is okay for now.

But, on the other hand, _he_ isn't very good at hiding it. Maybe the Hokage has seen his behaviour and then added one and one together.

I turn around a corner and just want to enter the mission room when I stop dead and-

"What! You come here with us only to let us do it?", I hear Naruto yell. I know that tone. He's… let's say 'not pleased' with Kakashi.

Kakashi-'sensei'. 'Kakashi-sensei' for me outside my mind. At least until-

"Obviously", said sensei snarls. He seems pissed, too. And he's throwing glances around the mission room like he's searching for something.

Or somebody.

It really _is_ obvious. And he's supposed to be one of the best shinobi of Konoha AND a genius.

"Is everything alright, Kakashi-sensei?", Sakura asks, sounding worried. And Sasuke seems to have left his own little world to look something like attentive.

Now this isn't good. They are the last ones I want to notice Kakashi's… condition.

-sensei. Kakashi-sensei.

"Yes", he says now and puts away that orange book. I really can't understand how he's able to read them the whole day. I've tried, I really have, and I had to break off every story after a few pages 'cause they were so… let's say 'bad written'.

But… There had been this one with the schoolteacher and the security guard…

"Are you sure, sensei?"

"Yes, I am", Kakashi-_sensei_ answers, sounding somewhat strained. "Everything is perfectly fine. I just remembered that I have to be somewhere." His eye lights up a little as if he's thinking of something pleasant. "I'm sorry, but it's really urgent that I leave now, so-"

He scratches his right upper thigh.

Like he always does when handing in one of his single-mission reports late and telling me why he wasn't on time this time. Every single time he lies to me and scratches his thigh and doesn't know that I know the real reason why he's late is because he waited for my shift to start, for me to be there to take his report.

"Don't believe him. He's lying", I laugh before I even realise that I've done it.

He turns around and glares at me and-

"Iruka-sensei!"

Did he just chirp my name?

"Hello, Kakashi-sensei." I smile at how the visible part of his face lightens up at my sight. I walk a little closer to him.

And the others, of course.

"Iruka-sensei!" Naruto runs to me and throws himself in my arms. I see Kakashi glare a little at him.

-sensei.

"Hey, be careful", I laugh and swing Naruto around before I ruffle his hair. I know he hates that so I do it a little more. I just want to invite him to a bowl of ramen (more like twenty), when-

"What do you mean, Kakashi-sensei is lying?", Sakura asks. "How do you know?"

I grin. I've always known that girl was smarter than most other kids her age. Won't give that chance away, ne?

"I can tell." I grin a little wider and wink at Kakashi before I can think about not doing it.

He stares at me, then blinks. Once. Twice.

"How can you tell? Tell me? Please? Pleeeease?", Naruto whines and interrupts me watching his sensei.

Who should stop me right now before I tell his students, shouldn't he? But instead he just keeps staring at me in this way like he can't believe I really winked at him. I mean, really. I winked at him. I didn't jump him, yank his mask down and kiss him right here in the mission room in front of his students.

Although I'd like to do that right now.

I force the image out of my head and my mind back to reality.

"No telling, Naruto." I smile to hide my earlier thoughts. "Can't let you read your teacher, can I?"

Still no reaction from Kakashi.

"But-", Naruto starts.

"No telling." I guess it would be fun to watch Kakashi's face if I really told them but that wouldn't be worth it. "But I'm sure Kakashi-sensei always has a good reason for lying to you."

Yeah, sure.

"Do you, Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura sounds highly suspicious and I have to suppress a laugh.

"I do", he answers, visibly snapping back into reality although the kids don't seem to notice.

Does he really? I'm not sure about that.

I smile brightly and see him drift off again while watching me doing so. He really has it bad.

"I bet he wants you all to learn how to detect lies so you will be prepared if you have to deal with enemy nins." I just feel that I should help him. Although torturing him is fun, too.

"…Yes." He nods. "To make you learn how to detect lies."

That's a really good reason, isn't it?

"Oh, then it's okay." Sakura doesn't sound convinced.

"Enemy nins?" I knew Naruto would react that way. "When will we have to deal with enemy nins? Tomorrow? Kakashi-sensei? Tomorrow?"

"Never if you don't hand in that mission report soon", I laugh and check the time. "I can't take it from you anymore, my shift ended two minutes ago." And I've got lots of free time now. Just in case SOMEBODY would finally like to ask me out.

"I will!" Naruto storms away to the queue, Sakura and Sasuke following him.

Perfect time to arrange a date, now. If only SOMEBODY could at last-

"Where have you been up till now?", Kakashi asks me.

Now see who's jealous.

"Taking some reports to the Hokage to sign", I answers lightly, shrugging my shoulders.

"Oh."

Sounds more like, 'Good. Just the Hokage.'

We stand near the door, he pretending to watch his students while watching me from the corner of his eye, me waiting.

And waiting.

And waiting…

…

Oh, screw it!

"Don't you want to know how I could tell you were lying?", I whisper into his ear after closing the space between us without him noticing.

He jumps a little. "M-hm", he nods finally. He smells like leaves and earth… Hmmm, very nice. Quite addictive, in fact.

"I could tell you…", I whisper.

"Please", he croaks. And his voice is shaking a little. He really has it BAD. I guess I could tell him anything I want now, and he would listen to me all day.

"But better not here, don't you think? Too many people. You sure don't want anybody to eavesdrop?" And I don't want anybody to interrupt us.

"No, certainly not!" He likes the idea. I knew he would. Now he has an excuse to spend time with me.

But that's not what I want. No excuses.

"So… What do you think about dinner tonight? We could go to that little restaurant near the Hokage Tower if you'd like…" It's nice there. And they've got some tables separated from the rest of the room.

"Sounds go-" He hesitates when the realisation finally sinks in. A genius, really. "Did you just-"

"Ask you out?", I interrupt him, grinning a little not to scare him out of it now I almost have him, scratch my nose a little to hide my sudden nervousness, blush a little when I think of the chance to see him without his mask. "I did."

"Oh." He goes tomato. I can see it creeping over the edge of his mask.

"So, would you like to go?", I ask as lightly as possible. I'm still a little nervous. I know he likes me an awful lot, but I also know that he isn't that skilled when it comes to dealing with people apart from a battle. That he's very uncertain. I figured out ages ago that this was the reason why he hadn't asked me out by himself yet.

"I- Yes… Yes, I really would like to go." He grins like mad under his mask. If I wasn't so relieved, too, it would probably scare me out of my skin.

"It's a date then." I smile, using that word to make sure he realises what I really want.

"Yes, a date." He looks happier than I've ever seen him. If I hadn't already, I would fall for him right now.

But there's one more thing to do.

"You scratch the side of your right upper thigh", I whisper.

"What?" He looks down at his hands twisted into his vest and frowns. Cute.

"Not now", I laugh and almost brush my lips against the shell of his ear. "You do it when you lie. That's why I could tell."

"…Oh."

"M-hm." I grin and wink at him again, although on the inside I'm more nervous than ever. I only hope he'll not shy away.

"But- but why are you telling me now? I thought you would tell me tonight?" He looks like a kicked puppy, obviously fearing I would cancel our date. Stupid Hatake!

"Well, I'd like us to meet tonight because we want to be with each other, not because I need to tell you." I want him to be sure I set this date because I WANT to date him. I want to make sure he can't tell himself he only came because he had to know how I could tell he was lying. Just in case he should be afraid of this going on between us tomorrow. I've waited long enough for him and now I don't want to let him ruin everything because of his stupid fears.

"I- I would have come because I wanted to… be with you", he stammers.

"I know that, Kakashi." I laugh again. I know he wants to be with me. What other reason could there be for him to sneak into the Academy at night or to watch me from the tree outside my apartment window? "I only wanted to make sure that you know I will do so, too."

He goes dark cherry this time.

For the sake of this, Kakashi, be brave. Be brave so you can become _my_ Kakashi.


	2. Part 2: Crying

Disclaimer: Don't own.   
Names, Part 2 - Crying 

by nayru-kleinefee

"Oi! Iruka-sensei! Come over here and-"

"No time, Naruto!", I only yell back, waving at him over my shoulder. "Have to be somewhere!"

"Okay, Iruka-sensei! See ya tomorrow!" I almost can't hear the last word in my hurry.

I can't believe it!

I'm late.

I'm late for my date with Kakashi.

Kakashi, the famous/infamous I'm-always-late Kakashi.

And, if I judge him right (and I'm sure I do, at least this time) today he'll be the I'm-always-late-but-this-one-time-(when-Iruka's-late-)I'll-definitely-be-on-time-for-my-date-with-Iruka Kakashi.

I'm not quite sure if I shouldn't be flattered.

And it's not my fault I'm late!

At least not entirely.

Okay, it's my fault for taking too long in choosing an outfit (and ending up in my normal clothes except the vest for not looking like I had dressed up for this) and debating on whether to wear a ponytail or let my hair fall open. But it's not my fault I'm so worried about looking good. It's his fault, isn't it?

Now that I think about it, I probably should have chosen to wear my hair open…

But too late, I'm almost there.

I sprint around the corner of the Hokage Tower to see the little restaurant appear before me. And Kakashi's really standing in front of it already, throwing glances left and right and looking so utterly anxious and cute and-

Hey! No, no, stop! Don't go to the other side of the house! I'm over here, no need to look for me around there!

"Kakashi!" I see him jump as he hears my voice, then he turns towards me.

"I-Iruka", he stammers. "-sensei, I mean, erm…" And he's twisting his hands into his vest again.

"Just 'Iruka' is fine with me, Kakashi", I assure him, smiling, and see his face lighten up. "Did you wait long for me? I'm very sorry I'm late, but-" But what? 'But I've been wandering up and down in front of my mirror for nearly an hour, changing in and out of my whole closet'? 'But I've showered three times longer than usual, using my conditioner four times, just to make sure my hair's looking perfect'?

Well, at least it does.

"It's fine, Iruka-se- Iruka." Kakashi smiles at me. "I haven't been here for long."

"Oh, good. I'm relieved."

"I- Iruka, I…"

"Yes?"

"I… Thank you for going out with me", he whispers, looking straight down to his toes.

I laugh. "There's no need to thank me for that, Kakashi. I told you I wanted to."

"Oh." He looks at me, an almost surprised expression showing on the visible part of his face. I have to keep myself from groaning at that. Didn't he get it _yet_?

"Shall we now, Kakashi?", I ask instead.

"Shall- I- Oh." His eye widens. "You mean-"

"Yes. Start the date." I smile again. "I reserved a table for us when I went home from the mission room. It's a little out of sight from the others so we won't have to be afraid of somebody watching." Except me. Can't wait to see his face.

"Somebody watching?" He seems to falter a little but I'm not entirely sure about that.

"Sure. Maybe you can enjoy your food then instead of wolfing it down as usual." I didn't just sound like a teacher, did I? 'Don't eat too fast, kids. You'll get stomach-ache.' I sure hope not.

"Oh… Oh!" His face (well, his eye) is practically beaming now. "You meant- Oh, yes, I- That's great."

"Shall we then?", I ask, smiling at his happy expression.

"Yes, please." He jumps to the restaurant's entrance and opens the door then waits for me to step in. Nice.

---

"And then the cat jumped out of Sakura's arms and right onto Sasuke's head. And then Naruto jumped to get the cat and ended up sitting in Sasuke's lap with the cat on _his_ head."

"No!", I laugh and almost spill my water.

"Yes!" Kakashi nods eagerly. "And Sakura was laughing so hard she fell backwards to the forest floor but she only laughed even harder after that!"

"Ha- That- ha- Oh, my god!" I can't breathe, I'm laughing so much I feel tears run down my cheeks. "P-please stop", I beg. "I'll die!" I keep on laughing, trying to take a breath in between.

"Iruka-sen- Iruka, are you alright?", I hear Kakashi ask anxiously.

"I- I- I'm fine", I manage to force out. "I'm fine, just-" I'm shaking by now and my face feels so hot it has to be bright red although we haven't had alcohol at all. I would have never assumed that Kakashi could be such a great entertainer. "I'm sorry, Kakashi", I cough out after my laughter has subsided to giggles. "I'm normally not this silly."

"Oh no, don't be. You look really nice when you laugh and-" His eye widens in surprise. And shock, maybe.

"Thank you, Kakashi, that's nice of you", I answer, smiling. I wish I could see him while he's laughing but he's even managed to eat his food while I wasn't looking so I still have no clue what he looks like under that mask.

"I- I…" He swallows. "W-would you like something else to drink?" He points at my still almost full glass.

"No, thank you." I take a look at my watch and give a surprised start. 11:44 p.m. already! I haven't realised how long we've been together. "It's gotten really late, Kakashi", I say, smiling apologetically. "And I have to teach tomorrow morning." Although I'd really like to stay like this for much longer.

"Oh." He looks a little disappointed, but then smiles back at me. "Then I shouldn't…"

"What about you walk me home?", I offer while signalling the waitress to bring the check. "You're living that way, too, right?"

He looks at me in utter surprise. "Oh. I- I- Yes, I live that way. I- And I'd like to walk you home." He's blushing again under his mask. So cute!

"Great. No, that's mine." I grab the check before his hand can get a hold on it. "I invited you, remember?"

"But I-"

"No discussion." I fake a stern look, then smile broadly. "But you can pay the next time if you insist."

"The- the next time?", Kakashi stammers, seeming surprised.

I suppress groan then decide to tease him a little. "Sure. Unless you don't want to-"

"NO!" He almost jumps from his chair. "I- I mean yes. I mean… I-" He looks away from me and twists the tablecloth between his fingers, gaining himself an indignant look from a waitress passing by but he notices neither her glare nor me grinning at that. "I mean, I'd like to… see you again", he whispers finally.

Maybe I can kiss him right now while nobody's- No, the waitress is coming back towards us. Bad luck, Iruka.

"Then that's settled", I say, suppressing a sigh. Not that I would have let him get away with any other answer than 'yes'. I place the money on the table and stand up. "Let's go then."

"Yes!" Kakashi jumps up and almost stumbles over his chair in his haste. Soooo cute.

---

Outside the restaurant I take a deep breath of the slightly chilling air, then walk towards my house, knowing Kakashi right behind me.

"Iruka-s- Iruka?"

"Yes?" While walking on I turn my head towards him only to see him looking at his toes again.

"W-where would you like to go? I mean, the next d- time we meet?" He catches up with me while speaking, still not looking at me.

"Mmmh, what about watching a movie?", I suggest. "Or maybe going to a restaurant again." Then, only to be a little mean and see his reaction, I add: "Both would be nice for a second date."

His head snaps up to face me and his eye widens visibly in surprise. "A sec- a… I- I will think of… something", he finally manages. "For our… second date."

"I'm sure we'll have much fun." I grin. Like I had today. "Like I had today."

"Really?!" Oh Kami, I wish he would finally get rid of that I-can't-believe-he-really-likes-me attitude.

"Really. It was very nice tonight. I'm glad we did it." I smile at him as reassuringly as I can. "Oh, look. We're here already." I point at the front door to my apartment block.

"Oh." Sounds like 'Already?'

"Yes." I turn around to face him. "Thank you for the nice evening, Kakashi. I really had fun tonight." And you may kiss me goodnight now if you want.

"Me too." He's again looking at his toes.

"And I'm really looking forward to our next date." I wonder if he'd run away if I kissed him now. But he probably would.

"Me too." Still not looking up.

"Well, then tell me when you've decided what to do the next time." I'd really, really like to kiss him now. Maybe he wouldn't run far?

"M-hm." Now he's scratching the ground with his sandal. He's definitely uncomfortable. I should go inside now and give him time to digest everything.

"Well, goodnight then, Kakashi. And see you-"

He's kissing me.

He's kissing me!

I can feel his cloth-covered lips on mine, pressing gently, although I haven't seen him close the space between us. And all I see now is a cloud of silver hair. Mmmh, smells nice, I-

What am I doing? I'm not reacting! I'm missing my chance to kiss him back and-

"I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei." Kakashi takes a step back, eye full of… fear? "I'm really sorry, Iruka-sensei. I didn't mean to-"

And then he's gone, leaving only some leaves from his transportation jutsu.

I stare.

I blink.

I blink again.

I look at the leaves to my feet.

Idiot.

Idiot idiot idiot idiot.

Idiot!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He's not coming.

Iruka's definitely not coming.

-sensei.

And why should he? It's not that he has a date with someone special, someone nice or handsome or eloquent or…

It's only me.

But I really hoped he would come.

Maybe he will. Maybe he just… just… got distracted.

Although it's not that he would spend nearly an hour standing in front of his closet and trying to decide what to wear and then settle with his usual outfit.

Like me.

Or that he'd wash his hair three times to make sure it looks good and not filthy from the mission today.

Like me.

Iruka-sensei's not coming.

I glance right and left for about the hundredth time since I've arrived in front of the restaurant one hour early to make sure I'm not late.

He's not coming.

I sigh. I should better go home before somebody I know sees me. And tomorrow… I guess I can pretend I don't care about it. It's not that it's ripping me to shreds just to think I could have spent an entire evening with him.

And I can't blame him. I wouldn't come either if I was in his place. I wouldn't want to be seen with someone like me when I could have so much better friends.

I sigh in defeat and turn to walk to the Memorial Stone.

"Kakashi!" I jump as I hear a voice calling my name. It's him! I turn around.

"I-Iruka", I hear myself stammer. "-sensei, I mean, erm…" Do I have to say 'Iruka-sensei'? Or maybe I may say 'Iruka-san'? I certainly can't just address him with only his name, and-

"Just 'Iruka' is fine with me, Kakashi", he says, smiling. Really? I really may say just 'Iruka'? "Did you wait long for me?", he continues, looking worried. "I'm very sorry I'm late, but-"

"It's fine, Iruka-se- Iruka." I smile, utterly relieved that he really came. "I haven't been here for long." I would have waited even longer for him if I'd known he would come.

Iruka-sensei really came!

Iruka.

"Oh, good. I'm relieved", he says. Wait- relieved? Why? It's not that I have anywhere I'd rather be. And he certainly can't be relieved to see me.

"I- Iruka, I…" I'm so happy you came.

"Yes?"

"I…" I'll scare him away if I say that. "Thank you for going out with me", I manage, then have to stop me from hitting myself on the head. Now, that sounded really weird, even to my ears, although it's true. But I'm probably looking like the biggest fool ever. I look down to my toes not to see him laugh about me.

And sure he laughs. But it doesn't sound like I expected but friendly and warm. "There's no need to thank me for that, Kakashi. I told you I wanted to", Iruka tells me.

"Oh." I look up and see him smiling at me. Just like he doesn't care I'm acting like an idiot.

"Shall we now, Kakashi?"

What? "Shall- I- Oh." He means start the da- "You mean-"

"Yes. Start the date", he confirms, smiling. "I reserved a table for us when I went home from the mission room. It's a little out of sight from the others so we won't have to be afraid of somebody watching."

"Somebody watching?" I shouldn't be surprised, I really shouldn't. I could have guessed that he doesn't want to be seen with me.

"Sure. Maybe you can enjoy your food then instead of wolfing it down as usual." He frowns a little after saying this, the scar over his nose crinkling. He looks so perfect right now.

And he said-

"Oh… Oh!" He wanted to make sure I can eat in peace. "You meant- Oh, yes, I- That's great." It wasn't because he didn't want to be seen with me!

"Shall we then?"

Yes yes yes yes yes! "Yes, please." I can't wait! I run to the restaurant, force the door open and wait for him to enter.

---

"And then the cat jumped out of Sakura's arms and right onto Sasuke's head. And then Naruto jumped to get the cat and ended up sitting in Sasuke's lap with the cat on _his_ head", I hear myself saying.

"No!" His eyes go wide with laughter.

"Yes!" I nod. He likes it! "And Sakura was laughing so hard she fell backwards to the forest floor but she only laughed even harder after that!" And I did the same then.

"Ha- That- ha- Oh, my god!" Iruka's laughing so hard I'm afraid he'll start to suffocate. "P-please stop. I'll die!" He keeps on laughing, looking more beautiful than ever.

"Iruka-sen- Iruka, are you alright?", I ask when I see his face turn red. Beautiful. And his hair looks even better than usual tonight, so good I have to keep myself from reaching out and touching it. Maybe one day I will be allowed to see him wear it open.

"I- I- I'm fine", he coughs. "I'm fine, just-" He takes a deep breath and his laughter subsides to giggles. So cute! "I'm sorry, Kakashi. I'm normally not this silly."

But he's not silly, he's so cute! "Oh no, don't be. You look really nice when you laugh and-" Did I say that out loud?! He'll run away now. Or he'll be angry. Or-

"Thank you, Kakashi, that's nice of you." Or he'll be flattered? I would never have imagined that…

"I- I…" What did I want to say? Well, I know what I WANT to say, but I can't tell him I love him and- What am I thinking?! "W-would you like something else to drink?" Yes, very smart, Hatake. His glass is still more than half-full.

"No, thank you." Sure, he doesn't want anything to drink and- He's looking at his watch! Is he bored already? We haven't been here for longer than one hour, at longest, and- Wait! It's almost midnight?! "It's gotten really late, Kakashi", Iruka says, smiling. "And I have to teach tomorrow morning."

"Oh." Sure, he has to get up early tomorrow and it's not that he likes to be with me anyway, so I should be happy he spent so much time with me. "Then I shouldn't…" bother you anymore with my presence.

"What about you walk me home?" I stare at that. "You're living that way, too, right?"

"Oh." Walk him home. "I- I-" Walk him home! "Yes, I live that way." Or else I would move. "I- And I'd like to walk you home." I reach out for the check to pay and start WALKING IRUKA HOME as soon as possible.

"Great. No, that's mine." Iruka takes the check away from me before I can lay my hand on it. "I invited you, remember?"

"But I-" Why does he want to pay? It's not that I would want anything in return if I paid. He's not thinking that, is he?

"No discussion." He looks stern first then smiles at me broadly. "But you can pay the next time if you insist."

"The- the next time?" There'll be a next time? Really? He wants to go out with me AGAIN?

"Sure. Unless you don't want to-"

"NO!" He can't think that! I want to go out again! Please! "I- I mean yes. I mean… I-" Now I've made an idiot out of myself again. "I mean, I'd like to… see you again." Whenever I may.

"Then that's settled." He pays and stands up. "Let's go then."

"Yes!" I jump up and almost fall over my own feet. I feel myself blush really dark this time but Iruka only smiles.

---

Outside the restaurant he immediately starts walking towards his house and I follow.

"Iruka-s- Iruka?" Did he really mean he wanted to go out again?

"Yes?" I see him turn towards me from the corner of my eye but don't look up.

"W-where would you like to go? I mean, the next d- time we meet?" Now he can tell me we'll meet in the mission room and just go for a coffee or something. He couldn't have meant a second date when he said we'd meet again.

"Mmmh, what about watching a movie? Or maybe going to a restaurant again", he suggests. That would be nice. Would feel almost like a date, I guess. "Both would be nice for a second date", I hear him add then.

WHAT?! "A sec- a…" Did he just really say we'd have a second date? "I- I will think of… something", I mutter. "For our… second date."

A second date!

"I'm sure we'll have much fun. Like I had today."

REALLY?! "Really?!" Oh, I shouldn't have said that out loud. But... maybe he really… likes me… a little, maybe?

"Really. It was very nice tonight. I'm glad we did it." Iruka smiles warmly. "Oh, look. We're here already."

"Oh." Already? I wanted to spend more time with him.

"Yes. Thank you for the nice evening, Kakashi. I really had fun tonight." He sounds honest.

"Me too." I can't look at him. I wish I could stay with him only a little longer.

"And I'm really looking forward to our next date."

"Me too." I wish I could kiss him now. But he'll most certainly not want it and hate me then for doing it to him.

"Well, then tell me when you've decided what to do the next time."

"M-hm." I realize I'm scratching the ground with my sandal. I have to do something. Say something, Hatake! Or he'll go home and you'll be alone again.

"Well, goodnight then, Kakashi. And see you-"

I'm kissing him.

I'm kissing him!

I can't even remember approaching him but I can feel his lips on mine with my mask in between. I've never wanted anybody to see my face but right now I wish I could kiss him without my mask.

And it feels incredibly good, his lips are warm and soft and I can smell his hair and…

But…

He's not kissing back!

What am I doing? I'm kissing him and he's not kissing back and he will hate me for it and he's not kissing back and I'll never be allowed to see him again and he's not kissing back and-

"I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei." I force myself away from him. "I'm really sorry, Iruka-sensei. I didn't mean to-" Please, don't hate me, please!

I try to say more but I can't, barely making my hands form the seals to transport me back to my house so I won't have to see the disgust in his face when I look at him.

I appear in my living room, leaves scattered around my feet, my body shaking all over. I barely manage to stumble to a wall and slide my back down on it.

He'll hate me.

I feel like I'm going to suffocate and yank off my hitai-ate and pull down my mask to breathe more freely but it doesn't help.

He'll hate me.

I feel a tear flow down my cheek, several others following.

He hates me.

I sob, draw my knees to my body and bury my face on my arms crossed on them.

Iruka hates me.

-sensei.

Idiot.

Idiot idiot idiot idiot.

Idiot!


	3. Part 3: Trying

Disclaimer: Don't own.   
Names, Part 3 - Trying 

by nayru-kleinefee

I hear a soft knock on my door but I refuse to get up and answer. I could stay like this forever: curled up in a corner of my dark living room with tears drying on my face. I could stay like this, pretending that this evening never happened. Trying to live on pretending that.

That he doesn't hate me.

I ruined everything. Not that there was something, but… I ruined it.

Again, somebody knocks, louder this time. I don't make an attempt to read the chakra pattern outside to see who's bothering me in the middle of the night. In fact, I don't move at all.

He hates me.

How could I kiss him? I knew he wouldn't want it. Wouldn't want me.

Iruka-sensei hates me.

And there's nothing I can do to make him not hate me anymore. There's nothing I can try to make him forgive me.

Can't they stop knocking? It sounds like they'll break down my door soon. I bet it's Gai with one of his challenges. In my condition I'd probably beat him to a pulp.

And Iruka-sensei will hate me for that, too.

On the next door-shaking knock I get up and stumble towards it, barely managing to hide my face with my mask again although my hitai-ate is nowhere in sight. I will tell Gai to go away. To get lost. Like I am.

I yank the door open. "Listen, Gai, I really-"

I stare.

It's him.

It's Iruka.

-sensei.

"May I come in?", he asks, looking annoyed, at least from what I can see in the dark corridor outside my apartment.

"I… I…" What's he doing here? Does he want to scold me for kissing him? Tell me if I ever come near him again he'll-

"Thank you." He walks around me into my apartment, then turns around after some steps.

"What do you want?", I whisper and close the door.

"Talk."

Oh. "I know what you're going to say, Iruka-sensei", I mumble. "I promise I'll never-"

"You don't know anything", he says and I feel myself flinch. He's really angry. He hates me, now I'm sure.

"I came to- Oh hell, could we switch on a light, please?" Iruka-sensei walks towards me and reaches around behind me to switch the headlight on. "That's better. Now we-" He suddenly falls silent and stares at me wide-eyed.

"I'm sorry", I manage to force out. "I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei. Please don't hate me. I didn't mean to-"

"Kakashi", he whispers, still staring at me. And then he-

He- he's-

He's laying his arms around my neck and drawing me close.

"I'm sorry", I whisper, not daring to move a muscle. My heart's beating so fast and loud I can barely hear myself. "I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei."

„Shh." He hugs me tighter and rests his head on my shoulder. He's so warm.

But why is he doing this? He doesn't have to bother with me.

"Iruka-sensei, why… why are you doing this? You don't have to…" He doesn't have to care about me. It's not that I'm not used to being alone.

"I don't have to what, Kakashi?" He lifts his head and looks at me, then moves his hands to frame my face.

"You don't have to be here. I know you don't want to, so you don't have to pretend you do, just to make me feel better and-"

"You're an idiot", Iruka-sensei says but smiles at that. "Do you know why?"

I nod. "Because I thought you could like me and-"

"Because you thought I could _not_ like you."

"But-"

"I like you, Kakashi. I like you very much." He grins now. "Although or maybe because you're the biggest idiot I've ever met."

"You can't like me." Iruka-sensei's making fun of me. He doesn't really like me. How could he? I'm not even completely human, just shinobi. And I'm broken in so many ways, so imperfect. And he… he's perfect, full of life and laughter and everything I never had and never will have. "You can't like me", I repeat, trying to make him understand that I'm not worth him.

"I don't need your permission for that, Kakashi." Iruka-sensei lets his hands move back to my neck, then smiles again. "I fully intend on taking what I want from you without asking for permission."

And then-

He's kissing me.

He's really kissing me!

But it's over faster than I can react in my surprise. And Iruka-sensei frowns at me. I've done something wrong again! He'll leave and then-

"You really should kiss me back", he whispers, then smiles. "Else I could be confused and leave suddenly."

"I- I- But-" He wants me to kiss back? Why does he want that?

He sighs, then loosens his hold on me and steps back. I almost reach out for him but can restrain myself in the last second.

"Kakashi, listen to me."

"Yes?" I can still feel his warmth on me and it's hard to think now.

"I…" Iruka-sensei looks at me, then smiles again. "You're cute when you're confused."

"Wha-what?" Did he just say I'm cute?!

"Kakashi, I can't… I don't want to… Oh, could you stop looking like that? I can't concentrate", he laughs.

"I- loo- What?"

"Kakashi, why do you think I asked you out?"

Because I looked lonely and he had pity with me? "I don't know…" Please don't tell me you pitied me, please. Please lie to me.

"Do you think I lied when I said I wanted to go out with you?"

Yes? "No…"

"Do you think I lied when I said I had fun with you tonight?"

Maybe? "No…"

He sighs and shakes his head. "Why do you think I kissed you?"

"I don't know…"

"Do you think I would have done it if I hadn't wanted to?"

Probably not? "No…"

"Kakashi, do you know what your problem is?"

"To-" To be me? To want to be loved although I know that nobody could ever do that? To try and change that? To dare to hope somebody like Iruka-sensei could ever like me?

"You underestimate me. You have no faith in me."

No faith in _him_? "But- but I do have-"

"No, you don't." He's suddenly there again, right in front of me, his arms around my neck. "You think I'm superficial. Stupid. Can't look underneath the underneath. You think I can't realize what I could have in you."

No no no no no! "I never-"

"Yes, you do. I know you don't mean it as an insult, but you think I can only see you like everyone else does. You think I can't look deeper."

"There's nothing deeper. There's just me." Does he think I wouldn't wish there to be something else? Somebody else?

"Idiot. That's what I meant. There's you." He tilts his head, his lips almost touching mine under the mask. "That's all I want."

Iruka-sensei wants me? He can't! I'm just-

And he's kissing me again.

"Respond, will you?", he growls when all I do is stand there, wide-eyed.

I hesitantly place one hand on his back, the other on his hip. When he doesn't back away but makes an approving sound in his chest, I press my masked lips against his a little firmer and move the hand from his hip to his hair, touching the soft, perfect strands.

And he's still not backing away!

In fact, he's stepping even closer to me, one of his hands sliding into my hair.

It's all I ever wanted.

I only wished there wasn't my mask between us.

"Mmh, that's nice", Iruka-se- Iruka whispers against my lips.

Iruka.

_Iruka._

"Hmmm." I can't force my eyes away from his face. He's perfect. All I ever wanted. I dare to touch his hair-tie and when I don't receive a disapproving reaction, I loosen the tie to free his hair. It falls down around his face and I know now for sure that he's the most beautiful person I will ever see. I can't help but have to touch his hair again and again.

"But it's not exactly what I want." Iruka suddenly backs his head away a little but not enough to let my hand loose his hair. "Almost, but not exactly", he whispers.

"Wh- what do you want?" I'll give him everything he asks for. Everything. I don't care if it's illegal or immoral or anything. Whatever he wants from me.

"May I…" He looks at me, almost uncertain. He's going to ask me to do something bad. Something really bad. Maybe kill somebody. And I won't be able to refuse it.

"I-" I would do it even if I could refuse, I think. If he stays with me for it.

"Could… could you pull down your… mask?", he asks.

"I-" Oh. That's- that's all? I can do _that_. I can really do that for him, I'm sure. Granted, that's something I haven't done for anybody ever but-

"You- you don't have to", he suddenly stammers, looking away from me, his long hair hiding half of his face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to force you to do anything, I just thought… I…"

"No! No, I… I can do that." I really can. I'm sure about that. For him I can. I can try to give him whatever he asks me for. "I can… do that."

"Really?" He smiles at me, relieved. "But you don't have to if you don't want to."

"I want to." I really want it now. It will make him happy, make him smile again. That's what I want.

"Oh. Then…" Iruka looks at me, nervous again, and his cheeks are a little flushed. He's more than beautiful now. Then he moves his hands to my face and hooks his fingers under the edge of my mask. "May I?", he whispers.

"Yes." My heart beats so fast I feel like I'm going to faint anytime now. I close my eyes when I feel him lower the mask.

When the cloth slides down my face to my chin I hear him take in a sharp breath. Eyes still closed, I wait for him to say something.

But there's silence.

Is he disappointed? I know I'm not nearly as beautiful as he is but-

He's kissing me again.

I can feel his lips on mine this time, warm and soft and perfect, and he's sliding his arms around my neck again and drawing me close and I can feel his breath on my cheek and can't restrain me from embracing him with my arms, pulling him closer.

I can't say if an eternity has passed or a second when he removes his lips from mine, and when I open my eyes I see him smile at me again. And then he leans in and hugs me tight and whispers into my ear-

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Such an idiot!

Such an incredible, unbelievable, stupid, idiotic… idiot!

By the time I reach Kakashi's apartment door I've gotten myself into such a rage I'm not quite sure if I can stop me from yelling at him until one of us looses consciousness.

I knock, much softer than I feel to do. Such an idiot! Kissing me, surprising me, surprising himself, running away and- Aaargh! Idiot.

I like that word. Describes him best.

I knock again, harder this time, and after a little while again. I know he's in there, I can feel his chakra right through the door although it feels a little weird… disturbed or something. I bet he's inside there, trying to get what went wrong. Instead of asking me. Idiot!

That word's _perfect_.

This is getting me really pissed now. I knock again, very loud this time. If he doesn't open the door within the next… let's say, FIVE SECONDS, I'm going to break it down!

The exact moment I decide to either break his door or climb through a window, the door flies open. Great! He saved it. Now I will-

"Listen, Gai, I really-" Kakashi stops and stares at me. Gai? Why the hell did he expect Gai in the middle of the- Riiiiight. Challenge. Stupid, insane Jounin-idiots, altogether.

"May I come in?", I ask after he seems to want to keep staring at me although I can't tell exactly where he's looking because the apartment is dark and I can't see him very well. This is so… Aaargh!

"I… I…" Now come on. He can't be that surprised. What did he expect? That I would pretend this evening has never happened?

"Thank you." I walk past him and into his apartment. I know I'm rude but I don't have the nerves anymore to be polite. I really have to restrain myself not to bash him over the head for being so stupid.

"What do you want?", he whispers when he closes the door. Can't he guess? And what I want? Right now? Right now I can't decide if I should hit him or kiss him, this idiot.

"Talk", I say instead. Safe middle course until I decide what to do exactly.

"I know what you're going to say, Iruka-sensei", Kakashi answers. Well, I highly doubt that. "I promise I'll never-"

"You don't know anything." I see him flinch at that. Oh Kami! It really drives me mad to see him being so stupidstupidstupid.

"I came to- Oh hell, could we switch on a light, please?" I want to see him when I'm hitting him. Or kissing him. Still haven't decided yet.

Maybe I should do both. At the same time.

I reach behind him and turn on the light when he doesn't move. "That's better. Now we-"

His eyes are red and swollen.

He's been crying.

He's been crying!

Because of me!

I feel a wave of guilt wash over me. He wasn't just surprised, he was terrified back then. And he didn't just run away, he ran away to cry. And I was angry with him. I didn't know-

I'm the idiot here.

"I'm sorry", he chokes out and I feel my stomach twist painfully. "I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei. Please don't hate me. I didn't mean to-"

Hate him? "Kakashi." He thinks I hate him. Hate him because he kissed me. Oh no, it's because I didn't kiss back. Oh Kami, what have I done?

I can barely breathe. And then I can't hold me back and lay my arms around his neck and draw him close. He tenses immediately and I feel like crying.

"I'm sorry", he whispers and I feel his heart beating in his chest, fast and irregular. "I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei."

„Shh." I'm so sorry, Kakashi. Please forgive me. I didn't mean to hurt you. I hug him tighter to reassure him.

"Iruka-sensei, why… why are you doing this?", he asks suddenly. "You don't have to…"

"I don't have to what, Kakashi?" I touch his face and feel my hands shake. I think I know what he means but don't want it to be right. He's still thinking I don't like being with him.

"You don't have to be here. I know you don't want to, so you don't have to pretend you do, just to make me feel better and-"

"You're an idiot", I interrupt him before he makes me burst into tears, then smile a little shakily to try to comfort him. But I mean it. "Do you know why?" I bet he doesn't. Genius or not, he's the stupidest person I've ever seen.

Although I'm not smarter either, it seems.

He nods. "Because I thought you could like me and-" Yes, I thought so.

"Because you thought I could _not_ like you", I tell him.

He frowns. "But-"

"I like you, Kakashi. I like you very much", I admit, grinning to hide my sudden nervousness. "Although or maybe because you're the biggest idiot I've ever met." I guess it's because.

"You can't like me", he whispers. Definitely because. "You can't like me." And repeating something doesn't make it better.

"I don't need your permission for that, Kakashi." It would be nice but I don't have enough patience left to wait for that. I embrace him again, then smile. "I fully intend on taking what I want from you without asking for permission." Great words, Iruka. Would be perfect if your legs didn't shake that much.

He frowns again and I can't resist. I kiss him.

And he's not kissing back. Now that's a _really_ bad feeling. I can understand why he was frightened earlier.

"You really should kiss me back", I whisper, then I smile and can't hold back to say: "Else I could be confused and leave suddenly." I'm sure he doesn't deserves this, but maybe saying it will keep _me_ from running away this time.

"I- I- But-", he stammers, obviously still not getting what I'm trying to say. I sigh and step back, hoping a little that he will finally get it and draw me back in.

"Kakashi, listen to me", I start.

"Yes?" He seems distracted.

"I…" He's so cute right now, frowning and obviously lost in thoughts. "You're cute when you're confused."

"Wha-what?" Even cuter now.

"Kakashi, I can't…" –look at you when you're like that without wanting you all for myself. "I don't want to…" –share this side of you with anybody else. Ever. "Oh, could you stop looking like that? I can't concentrate." I laugh. I really must have it bad when I start being possessive, but I it's him so I can't change it. Don't want to either.

"I- loo- What?" How can a grown man with a mask covering almost all of his face be so cute?

"Kakashi, why do you think I asked you out?" To make sure I get you before somebody else does.

"I don't know…" No, sure he doesn't, but I guess that's better for now.

"Do you think I lied when I said I wanted to go out with you?" Do you know I've wanted this for a _really_ long time now?

"No…" Doesn't sound confident.

"Do you think I lied when I said I had fun with you tonight?" I haven't had this much fun in years. And I'm friends with Genma.

"No…" A little more convinced this time.

I can't stop myself from sighing and shaking my head. Idiot. Not-getting-what-I'm-trying-to-say idiot. "Why do you think I kissed you?" Because that's something I wanted to do the entire evening and even longer.

"I don't know…" Now really. Genius, hu?

"Do you think I would have done it if I hadn't wanted to?" Do you think you could have stopped me from clinging to you for hours if you had reacted properly?

"No…" Hey now, do I look like somebody walking around and kissing people I don't want to kiss?

"Kakashi, do you know what your problem is?" You're an idiot. You don't get it.

And I'm an idiot in love with you.

"To-"

"You underestimate me. You have no faith in me." Does he think I don't know what I'm doing?

Did I just admit I'm in love with him?

"But- but I do have-" No, he doesn't.

I really _am_ in love with him.

"No, you don't." I approach him again, drawing him close to me. "You think I'm superficial. Stupid. Can't look underneath the underneath. You think I can't realize what I could have in you."

I love you.

"I never-"

"Yes, you do. I know you don't mean it as an insult, but you think I can only see you like everyone else does. You think I can't look deeper." I can see _you_, Kakashi. And maybe now I can finally see me.

I love you. Please try to understand that I'm trying to tell you.

"There's nothing deeper. There's just me." He looks away from me.

"Idiot. That's what I meant. There's you." I near my face to his. "That's all I want." I kiss him.

And Kakashi's again not kissing back. I groan inwardly.

"Respond, will you?", I growl and he finally places his hands on my back and hip. Now that's nice. I purr a little before I can stop myself and he kisses back, then moves his hand to my hair. And then I decide there's still too much space between us and inch closer to him, tangling my hand in his hair.

That's all I ever wanted.

I only wished there wasn't his mask between us.

"Mmh, that's nice", I whisper and feel Kakashi smile against my lips.

"Hmmm." He leans back and watches me, looking totally content now and happy. Then I see a look of utter concentration appear on his face and he loosens my hair-tie hesitantly, letting my hair fall down. He looks at me, stunned, it seems, and lets his hand slide through the strands again and again, his eyes looking almost hypnotized. I wish I could see his face now.

"But it's not exactly what I want. Almost, but not exactly." What? What did I say?

"Wh- what do you want?" He's nervous now! He'll run away again! I have to tell him something to soothe him!

"May I…" What am I going to say?!

"I-" Kakashi looks at me, so very uncertain. I should shut up now and kiss him again! Just not say-

"Could… could you pull down your… mask?" No! Not that, Iruka! Are you crazy? He'll never do that.

"I-" He watches me. He's nervous and confused now. He won't do it. Why did I ask?

"You- you don't have to", I stammer hastily, not daring to look at him now. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to force you to do anything, I just thought… I…" Don't run away, please! I didn't mean to upset you.

"No!", he almost shouts and I prepare myself for his sudden disappearance. "No, I… I can do that. I can… do that." Wait… He- he can? He will?

"Really?" I smile. I'm so relieved he didn't run. "But you don't have to if you don't want to."

"I want to." He wants to!

"Oh. Then…" I feel my cheeks burn when I hook my fingers under the edge of his mask. I'm so nervous now I feel like fainting. "May I?", I whisper hoarsely. Please?

"Yes." Kakashi closes his eyes and I almost feel like doing the same. I look down at his chest, then lower the mask, let it slide down his face and rest around his neck.

Then I dare to look at him.

I gasp. He's- he's- I don't know what to think, he's not gorgeous or beautiful, not in the way these words are used normally, but he's handsome and attractive and-

And I'm the only one who knows.

I'm the only one to see the scar from his left eye trailing down his cheek, to see that nose and those lips, not too thin and not too broad but so…

Kissable.

And they feel perfect on mine, warm and soft and a little moist from the mask and perfect, and I can't help but draw Kakashi close again, feeling his arms around me.

When I break the kiss and he opens his eyes and looks at me with this I-can't-believe-this-is-really-happening look on his face, I know I'm one idiot helplessly in love.

I lean closer and hug him tighter and whisper-

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"I'm yours. Be mine?", Iruka asks me.

_My_ Iruka.

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"I'm yours", Kakashi answers then leans in to kiss me again.

_My_ Kakashi.


	4. Author's Note

A/N: I'm sorry there's an empty story of me flying around (Names). It was supposed to be this story, but I had problems getting the change of POV right.

If anybody could tell me how to remove the link from the Naruto-site, I would be very grateful!

Anyway, thanky for reading the story, I hope you enjoyed it!

Nayru


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